Words Fail

With a BA in Communication and 26 years of verbal and non-verbal under my belt, one would think I should be able to express myself. But words fail. I can't adequately tell you of the experiences I've had these past 16 days in the village, the extreme manic of it all-highs and lows, loneliness and community, joy and sorrow, love and hate. I'll do my best and trust that over the next 2 years words will come to fill in the gaps.

Some background first regarding the Peace Corps. Peace Corp has 3 main goals, to help the host country with technical needs, for Americans to learn of the culture and then for the host country to learn how Americans live. My specific program, HAP (HIV/AIDS) focuses on education regarding the disease, assisting orphans and vulnerable children and teaching on healthy living. That is about all the structure I've been given. The ambiguity of the situation is both a blessing and a curse. In my 2 years I'm supposed to partner with host country nationals to build sustainable development- programs, clubs, mindsets that will continue long after I've returned to caramel lattes and guacamole. So this last Sunday I was dropped off in the middle of the village, and told to radio from the clinic if I'm dying. You can imagine the extreme panic that hits a girl as she hugs her friends goodbye and watches the Land Cruiser kicking up dust as it drives away. Words fail.

My village is amazing! My hut is about 100 feet from my neighbor so I can see them and know they're watching me at all times-literally. Everywhere I go people are so excited to stare at me, to talk with me, touch me. For some of them I am the only white person they have ever seen. I've always thought it was funny that Jesus is portrayed in our American culture as light skinned and blue eyed. Now I'm convinced that he may have looked like this-it definitely gets people's attention. The setting of my village is woodsy right by my home and then lots of fields just past. We have a couple small dams and with my love of water it is pretty rad to just sit and think. My actual village is called Simane village, one of the 13 villages that make up the greater Chifusa area. I have found a couple people who speak English, but for the mostly part Tonga is the only way I can talk with villagers. I try my best, but again, words fail.

Already, in spite of loneliness and severe annoyance with bugs, I feel God has me here for a reason. I'm going to break up the blogs and tell you more specifics-but it’s really awesome to see hoe things are falling into place. Relationships and experiences with you all back home have shaped and equipped me to serve effectively here. I am praying about specific ways I can bring you into this experience with me and ideas are forming. When my words fail to God I am thankful for the Holy Spirit who can communicate my needs far better. Please continue to pray for me, that I can glorify God through my life here, that His plans will be my reality.

I thank my God in all my remembrances of you.